Monday, 06 April 2020

Go to work on a Smacker!

Go to work on a Smacker!

Well I think I just have heard it all now. A cheeky new 'Kiss and Ride' sign outside Preston Railway station is encouraging their commuters to indulge in a little tonsil hockey as they bid each other farewell for the day. Apparently the folk of Preston are a lot more awake than most of us are in the early morning because they have been lingering in the loading bay unable to tear their lips from those of their dropees.

Virgin reckons that the sign reminding passengers that there is no parking will see them off quicker. I’m not so sure. By marking the drop off point a ‘kiss and ride’ zone they are giving the green light for the amorous activity without setting a time limit - maybe 30 seconds and no returns for two hours Monday to Friday and unlimited smooching at the weekends? Meanwhile we are told that Britons chuck out tons of food every year, throwing away the equivalent of 6 meals a week. Well clearly not all of us, as my scales will attest. But then is it any wonder when we also hear today that in MacDonald’s fries is that tasty favourite dimethylpolysiloxane - a form of silicone found in Silly Putty along with a petrol-based chemical called tertiary butylhydroquinone (TBHQ).

Yum! One word of caution for those being dropped off at Preston kiss and ride, kissing is not compulsory so if Baz the bricky from number 8, gives you a lift when your car breaks down, probably best not to follow the instruction.

Catchup with you tomorrow!
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