Tuesday, 07 April 2020

This is how politics works.

This is how politics works.

What's Trump actually holding?

​American President Trump waved a curious piece of paper in front of reporters, stating it's a secretive document about illegal immigration, the one that will finally resolve the burdening situation on the Mexican border. However, Catchupnews has some theories about the contents of the paper Trump is holding up: - It's a  bill for gas consumpt...
Continue reading

American-French experiment proves trees have feelings too

​The oak tree that was planted during Emanuel Macron visit to the US by a joint effort of Macron and his American mate Donald, reportedly died off during the brief period spent in tree quarantine. The sources told to Catchupnews that the three was seriously hurt when the feud between the two presidents started, and just didn't see any purpose when ...
Continue reading

US sees their fossil fuel resources as molecules of freedom

​In the land of freedom and democracy, there's freedom even beneath the ground level, in ores and gases, in dirt and waste. The US Department of Energy official issued a Twitter statement that glorifies American gas as freedom spreading gas, designated to serve American allies throughout the world. This Catchupnews reporter got to smell this freedo...
Continue reading

London tube mosquito subspecies

​A special mosquito subspecies developed in the London tube surrounding – Culex pipiens molestus , and unlike their mosquito cousins, they have flair for human blood only. The London mosquitoes also don't feel any necessity to hibernate in the winter time, and spread their blood-sucking activity throughout the year. They definitely remind us of pol...
Continue reading

Police bans McDonald's milkshake in Edinburgh

​Police banned local McDonald's outlets to serve milkshake or ice-cream during Nigel Farage's campaign rally in Edinburgh, fearing that full cups could be used as missiles against the campaigners. The ban comes after several incidents involving prominent politicians and dairy drinks, most often milkshakes. As Catchupnews was told, soft drinks were ...
Continue reading

Austrian Minister attends parliament session but forgets to put on shoes

​Austrian Minister for European Affairs Gernot Blimel just made a bold fashion statement in the Austrian Parliament by wearing no shoes at the regular assembly. The minister wore a neatly crafted dark suit, paired with a matching tie, but amazed the public by sporting turquoise socks, without shoes whatsoever. In Catchupnews' humble opinion, he's a...
Continue reading

Bhutan PM works as surgeon on weekends

​The prime minister of Bhutan, a little state in Asia, somewhere between India and China, stays busy on weekends – he operates and tends to his patients, Catchupnews was told. Most politicians, head of states, and local authorities try to make our lives miserable even on weekends..

Philippines declare war to Canada – trash kind of war

​Philippine president Duarte unofficially declared war to Canada over trash illegally shipped to Philippines. The garbage was sent to poor countries in order to keep Canadian nature pure and clean, as Catchupnews learns. "I will declare war against them. I will advise Canada that your garbage is on the way. Prepare a grand reception. Eat it if you ...
Continue reading

Trump's former chief strategist will allegedly teach and preach politics at Italian monastery

​The former White House former Chief Strategist Steve Bannon allegedly bought a medieval Italian monastery, and he's planning to open a political centre for young and prosperous politicians. As Catchupnews unofficially learns, the studies will include subjects such as Cambridge Analytica, Polls and whores, and Best hair for politicians. 
Wait a minute, while we are rendering the calendar

9 Chagford House, Chagford Street, London NW1 6EG

This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
+44 (0) 207 258 3565
+44 (0) 7701 044645